Three Ideas to Help your Wellbeing

Life often pulls us in so many directions. When you feel mired down from stress or overwhelm, here are three ideas that can help with your sense of wellbeing:

1) We can never underestimate the impact our kindness can have on a stranger. We can have no idea how we may be helping someone who is hurting with the simplest act of a genuine smile and eye contact. When we focus on extending our kindness to others it disrupts any unhealthy loops of negative thinking and gets you into good, yummy, wonderful feelings. No matter how busy we get, we can learn to take three seconds to give someone a warm genuine smile, or use a supportive tone of voice as we speak. With these simple practices, our lives can have more meaning.

2) If you have had a persistent painful issue that for years will not resolve, even with counseling, or support, and books, etc., start your day interrupting those negative feelings or thoughts by jumping and saying "STOP!" Then stand tall, put a huge smile on your face and go to a memory of when you were filled with joy or aliveness, or love. Replace the negative with a positive. Decide how you want to feel and be in charge. The pain may always linger in the background but you can make a choice to not let it run your life.

3) Our brains love silence. In this busy world, days and weeks can fly by without time for reflection. If you can, find some quiet time today and enjoy it. When we get quiet, we get to know ourselves in an important way. We can listen to our thoughts and connect to what we really hope for, decide on next steps, get clarity, and so much more.

May your day be filled with goodness.

Artwork by me: "The Place Where My Soul Rests" © Allison Massari For prints please click here.

For information about my keynote speaking please visit: www.AllisonMassari.com

Techniques You Can Employ When Dealing With Difficult Clients or Coworkers

Often I am asked about how to successfully handle difficult people. Every situation is so unique and may require a radically different approach. As a default, it is always good to start by assuming that you may be wrong about everything you think you know about the person and the situation. This brings a fresh, new perspective - an open mind - and is a powerful place to create true resolution. Feeling truly humble always helps us create the best possible outcome. We cannot control how a person responds, but we can do everything possible to help the person feel we are on their side, that we truly want understanding, that we are fair, that we want the best for everyone involved.

In my opinion, there is an epidemic of isolation. Rather than feeling a part of a team or community, we often feel separate. My goal is to bring a true message of hope, to catalyze our connection to our humanity. I care about people. I want them to feel supported, to be transported to a new way of thinking, to feel powerful in their lives.

When in doubt put yourself in the other person’s shoes, and keep your mind on the peaceful outcome you desire.

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Finding Your “Yes”

We all grow up with ideas about what life is "supposed" to look like. So much so, that when we struggle, or when things don’t happen as planned, or when the unexpected or imperfect happens and life is not up to par with our ideas, we feel that we have perhaps somehow failed…

Being human is not easy. There is always a challenge. There will always be something: relationship conflicts, that difficult person in the family, feeling betrayed by someone at work, fear around finances, pressures on the job and so on.

Life has immense beauty and extraordinary magic. And also....Life IS difficult.

It is RARE when everything goes perfectly. It is rare when we feel perfectly confident, perfectly beautiful, perfectly brilliant, perfectly rested - with the perfect savings account, the perfect abs, the perfect sugar intake... Of course, we always want to improve and we feel good when we are working towards our goals, but my point is - Life is imperfect!

What if every challenge or agitation is helping us to learn higher levels of compassion, forgiveness, patience, kindness, love and wisdom? What if we could truly celebrate that life is a school - for learning?

Human beings are amazing because we are so incredibly resilient. We can learn to forgive even when we have been betrayed, we can be kind even when we feel rejected, we can become stronger even after we feel we have lost everything. We learn to problem solve in dire circumstances, navigate difficult people, and master our anger and jealousy. Miraculously (and most importantly, and thankfully,) we can all find a way to love ourselves in spite of our imperfections.

As soon as we stop having resistance with this reality, and can see life as a dynamic and glorious process of growth, and embrace the incredible power of our human adventure - our whole world looks different. Everything becomes a touch easier with that simple shift of perspective. Peace comes by leaning in to our own journey and honoring each another as we travel together through life.

Finding Your "Yes"

"When change enters your life, be vigilant in every breathing moment to seek and find the good that is going to come from it. Search with ferocity. Have an unbending belief. The day will come when your heart smiles and rests. If nothing else, your pain will sculpt your spirit and: bring you to the ultimate destination - your self-mastery." -Allison Massari

In Case You Missed It: Recently I received  very  exciting news... It's was years in the making and at last the award-winning documentary film "Resolve" is out. (You will see me featured in it along with nine others as we share solutions for successfully overcoming adversity and post-traumatic stress - PTSD.) If you or a loved one is experiencing PTSD "this can be from the stress of war, shootings, catastrophic burns, loss of a child, paralyzing accidents, athletic injuries, emotional trauma or financial ruin" I am honored to share this film. It is produced and directed by Greg Strom and so g enerously  offered by him for free at this link:  Click here

This feature length film was hosted by the Head of Special Forces for the US Military in Afghanistan. You will also hear from Oz Sanchez (Gold medalist in the Beijing Paralympics), Lucia Rijker (World Champion kick boxer), and Shannon Hartnett (World Champion Athlete) along with other very special people. This film was edited exquisitely by Neil Sandilands. Thank you Greg Strom for creating something that can help so many people. You are amazing.

Very exciting news! The documentary film is out. And available free for you.

Today I received very exciting news... It's been years in the making and at last the award-winning documentary film "Resolve" is out. (You will see me featured in it along with nine others as we share solutions for successfully overcoming adversity and post-traumatic stress - PTSD.) If you or a loved one is experiencing PTSD "this can be from the stress of war, shootings, catastrophic burns, loss of a child, paralyzing accidents, athletic injuries, emotional trauma or financial ruin" I am honored to share this film. It is produced and directed by Greg Strom and so  generously offered by him for free at this link:  Click here - Please share. This feature length film was hosted by the Head of Special Forces for the US Military in Afghanistan. You will also hear from Oz Sanchez (Gold medalist in the Beijing Paralympics), Lucia Rijker (World Champion kick boxer), and Shannon Hartnett (World Champion Athlete) along with other very special people. This film was edited exquisitely by Neil Sandilands. Thank you Greg Strom for creating something that can help so many people. You are amazing.

2014 Meeting Planners' Favorite, 2013 Favorite Speakers List, 2012 Top Keynote Speakers List- Allison Massari

What an an honor it is to be voted by meeting planners as a favorite speaker in 2014, as well as being voted on this list in 2013, and voted as one of the top 10 keynote speakers for motivation in 2012. I thank each one of you who submitted me!

For the full reports 2012,2013 and 2014.

To learn more about Allison Massari's keynotes Click Here

MDRT's Magazine "Round The Table" July/August 2013 - Allison Massari

"It's such an honor! I just got the PDF of the lovely article in MDRT's Magazine "Round The Table" July/August 2013 issue. They made such a gorgeous layout, and the writing is an exquisite summary of my keynote message. Thank you to everyone at Million Dollar Round Table for the honor you have given me."—Allison Massari See the full magazine here: http://www.roundthetable.org

Three of My Secrets for Happiness

1) Embrace the idea that joy and pain exist side-by-side. Even if our lives are going well, there may be a loved one who is sick, or we may have pain from a difficult relationship, or regret from our past. First, our pain needs our love. Then...alongside that...try this... Imagine that you have a mountain of your pain in one hand - and your joy is in the other hand. Focus on the joy, even if it is the smallest thing. Then build your joy - grow it and nourish it - so much, that eventually your joy towers over your pain.

2) We have to be warriors for love.  I learned something beautiful about love from the martial art Aikido. Traditional Aikido teaches that when attacked, you do not attack back. Instead you redirect the force from your opponent to neutralize the charge and to restore their dignity. The intention is to create peace, to protect everyone from injury, including the attacker.

3) Tenacity, determination, courage, feistiness. Never give up. It's the synergy of these two qualities - love and guts - that creates total aliveness.

© 2011 Allison Massari

"Happiness" - Hand-colored monotype by Allison Massari. To see more of her artwork click here.

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Even After All This Time the Sun Never Says to the Earth, "You Owe Me"

"Even after all this time the sun never says to the earth, 'You owe me'. Look what happens with a love like that. It lights the whole world." - Hafiz

Art image for the week:  "Make My Heart the Sun" This is a "prayer painting" I made. It is my life-long desire and request that I can become more unconditionally loving - to have a heart made like the sun.

The truth is, that life will always push us up against the places where we can learn to be more loving. It is a never-ending process and very humbling.

* 13" x 19" signed prints are available: Please email allison@allisonmassari.com

When we truly rest in the knowing of who we are, no gossip can unfurl us, no intimidation can harm us, no unkindness can destroy our will to be generous.

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Claim the Fiery Babe Inside You

  Quiet frankly, the title of this digital art poster I made says it all. It is a self-portrait. It is a symbol of my path to being triumphant over tragedy.

"Claim the Fiery Babe Inside You" ©2011AllisonMassari

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Allison Massari Featured in Speaker Magazine 2012

Allison Massari was honored to be featured in Speaker Magazine.

TEDxZaragoza and "The Future of Happiness"

Allison Massari TEDxZaragoza

Without question 11.5.11 was one of the best days of my LIFE! The event was in Spain and the love and generosity of the organizers was off the charts…

Oh my, oh my I was blown away... A small group of 7 of people in Zaragoza with no money for the event, got a TEDx license. Their dream was to bring happiness to the people of Spain where there is a lot of suffering because of a 25% unemployment rate in some areas, among other things. They worked for one entire year, long hard hours (after full-time jobs) and convinced people to sponsor this event in a country where most did not know about TED.

They did all of the marketing on Twitter and managed to get over 7,000 people watching the event live on the internet! Plus almost 1million twitter comments!

The event was beyond amazing! EVERY detail and possibility was dreamed up and executed. They had unbelievable technological video and light shows creating visual impact on the stage and music that was created just for the event....

They answered (literally) hundreds of thousands of emails personally, helped coach the speakers, made videos to promote the event, they had a live jazz band as we entered the building and served chocolates while everyone gathered. And chefs volunteered to surprise all of us with food that would remind us of Happiness... the most beautiful confections in bright colors. As we entered the room after a break we were each handed little wrapped gifts. It was a magical day of constant giving like this and I was in awe. When the event was over the team went up to the stage (see photo below) and they said, "The entire stage set here behind us is made of boxes. Each big box has a gift inside, and everyone here gets one." Then they immediately began deconstructing the set and handing us all of these boxes one by one.... It was like they were giving us EVERYTHING they had to the end. It was so symbolic. I was crying...

TEDxZargoza Building

I left a piece of my heart in Spain...

Then all of the speakers walked around and served the whole audience champagne! There was so much love and laughing and sweetness and hugging... Then when I thought it was over they gave me bottles of champagne and then the whole team came to the hotel and stood shoulder-to-shoulder smiling and they handed me a box of special Spanish wine. They took all of us to an amazing dinner in Zaragoza. We shared late night stories and mojitos. Wow... I did not want to go to sleep.

Life is sweet when we make it good.

Let us all be inspired by what they have done.

Video Screen Shot

Other speakers with me were Barbara Ehrenreich, Nic Marks from the UK, Erling Kagge the adventurer from Norway, and more...

Organizers

p.s. Many of my Spanish friends now have Russian alias names. Need I say more?

While I was in Spain giving my TED talk I was given the name, "The Ambassador of Happiness". It seems to have stuck. I love that... May I always bring you happiness.

I love you all.

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